Yes, the rumors are true! You won't see me at any of the HFT shows at LiFest this summer
But, no, I'm not missing the shows because I broke my cell phone with which I tell time and I got caught up standing in a long line for a restroom... no! (although, I did break my cell phone recently...)
Nay, alas, I am sitting the in comfort of my own home (constantly running to our restroom!) because I am great with child.
That's right folks, Wes and I are having ourselves a little bundle of joy this August (or maybe early September). So I'm taking a bit of time off.
The pregnancy has been going pretty darn well so far, thanks for asking. The early months were marked by being mildly naseus and overwhelming tired. The middle months were marked by feeling very healthy and energetic, but very awkward. None of my old clothes fit but I wasn't big enough for maternity clothes yet. And its that weird time where you stand with your hand on your stomach a lot so that people aren't afraid to ask you when you are due. These final months... phew. No one is afraid to ask when I'm due. In fact you can tell they are starting to think "Oh... August huh... I thought it'd be sooner." And these months are marked by great, great happiness now that I feel the baby moving all the time, and also marked by a great panic of "uh-oh... I thought we had some time to get ready for this baby before it arrived....where did all that time go?!"
But we'll never be ready for little Zuzu (that's what we call the baby in utero). And we're already ready, it just depends on how you look at it.
Yes, we call the baby Zuzu. You know, like Zuzu the little daughter with the flower petals from the best movie ever "Its a Wonderful Life."
We chose the name first, and then later found out that it means "Lilly."
And --its a long story-- the short version is that I'm a worrier by nature and the Lord convicted me early on in the pregnancy that this was to be a pregnancy of Hope. That I would not worry and plan for the bad things, but that I would hold onto a hope that I could not see. Not that "everything would be alright" but that I only had to deal with one day at a time. No matter what lies in the future, good or bad, God promises not to forsake us, and to provide us with what we need.
I was reminded about a month after choosing the name and being very convicted about this worrying vs. hope thing, that there is a verse in the Bible that says, "Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory did not clothe himself like one of these."
Its from Matthew 6, verses 24-33… read them all. It’s a good passage.
Its pretty convicting to me, that my worrying about my life seems like its "healthy" and "well-intentioned" but really is just saying, "God, don't worry about it. I've got it from here. Thanks for all your work. I think I can do fine without you."
And there's nothing like the "miracle of birth" or.... for me... nothing like the "miracle of having something growing inside of you that keeps kicking your ribs and hiccupping when it hears loud crashes in movies!" to remind me that I'm not creating this child. I'm... just... not. I'm eating. I mean, sure that's contributing, but starving and unhealthy women give birth to babies all the time. Something out there is knitting together a child in my womb, and its not going to check out once this baby makes its first appearance to the world.
So, I'll be here celebrating my own little festival of life while HFT is out on the road. I'll try to refrain from actually giving birth until Wes gets back in town. Meanwhile, drop me a line. Predictions on the babies gender? Name suggestions? Favorite ice cream flavor that I must try?